Cuts.

It is easier for me to believe that there is a reason for the tears that I shed. I am scared, terrified, petrified. I wonder what crime have I committed, why am I the victim? A friend told me, '....life's always unfair.' They stole my tears.They stole my faith in my innocence. The stole my friend. They stole my security. Three years later I remain an outsider.

Loner. Hate the word. I do not wish to be one. Unfortunately I have found that I feel loneliest when I am unoccupied. I should learn to live in this alien land. I want life to be simple. Where could I find my comfort zone again? I knew I had the girls and was comfortable in their company. Yet life moved on and I relocated to a new space, where I am forced to create a new routine. But I fear that I am lack of courage needed to create a new comfort zone.

I want to return to my old home, my old comfort. But I cannot because that space does not exist anymore. Life happened. And that demolished my old comfort zones. I need a push over the edge...push me please?